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I seen the first sentence in my google reader and felt that that was enough of a great line for me to not read the rest of this entry.
Ive not seen the application form for pirates lately, but I dont think they are allowed to ask if "you have any crustacean friends?" I think its un-PC.
God to hear you are in good health, I could just imagine how embarrassing it could be going to A&E and saying "my dinner attacked me."


I made the mistake of buying live lobster once - to appease the french ex. A bad idea, as you discovered. He thought it was cruel to put them in boiling water, and thought it'd be nicer to heat it up slowly - the oxygen gradually seeping out of the water and the lobster falling asleep.

Well that was the theory. Sadly the practice involved me holding down the lid of the pan, hard, for twenty minutes with the poor bastard battling against it - every time I loosened my grip a claw would reach out over the side and try to grab me. Gruesome.

I haven't eaten lobster since.

Mrs RW

Is it your mission in life to see how just how far you can terrorize your wife and child before they call in a swat team? I'm going to mail Tracy a stun gun for occasions like this one. She can use it at her discretion.


Good points about pirates, Rob, but I'm afraid I've been to A&E with far more embarrassing accidents than lobster nips!

Your tale made me laugh out loud, LondonGirl! I was advised to stab the poor things through the back of the neck to kill them instantly. I did that. It wasn't pleasant and as far as I could tell it didn't work - they still wriggled wildly when they went into their 'bath'. I might gas them in the oven next time...

Oh, Mrs RW, you're so harsh! Having an 'active' childhood never did me any harm - just look how normal and well adjusted I've turned out... Tracey is very excited about the prospect of the gun though. She promises to be completely indiscreet in its use!


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